[Dear Lewis] How to Balance Self-Promotion and Humility in Performance Reviews?
In today's edition, an executive contemplates whether they should have a flamboyant or modest approach in their self-review.
Time for another episode of Dear Lewis. This time, I’m sharing the story of Alex, one of my executive coaching clients. (Alex is not his real name.)
Alex is tangled up in a web of anxiety about the upcoming midyear performance reviews, particularly his own self-review. Over the years, he’s heard so many conflicting pieces of advice that he’s now wondering whether he should toot his own horn or keep it a little more low-key.
Stick around to hear my advice for Alex.
Keep striving for greatness,
Lewis C. Lin
CEO, ManageBetter
P.S. Drowning in performance review paperwork? The new ManageBetter has got you covered! Our AI-powered system generates comprehensive reviews without you writing a word. Reclaim your time with a free trial. No credit card needed.
🤔 How to Balance Self-Promotion and Humility in Performance Reviews?
Alex's anxiety about his self-review is palpable. After 15 years of receiving mixed signals from managers and peers, he's feeling utterly disoriented - like he's been whirled around in a dizzying teacup ride at the county fair, leaving him uncertain which way is up.
Some of his peers have been in his ear, urging him to toot his own horn, insisting that if he doesn’t sell himself, no one else will. On the flip side, his managers have slapped his wrists for being too self-promotional and unrealistic in his past reviews. It’s no wonder he’s at a loss, the poor guy, and the thought of another performance review is keeping him up at night. So, he came to me, hoping for some clarity and a way out of this mess.
I advised Alex to err on the side of humility.
Imagine, I said, if you oversell your performance. Your manager will have to deflate that puffed-up balloon, and that’s where things get prickly. Defending your oversold accomplishments can quickly turn into a game of dodgeball, with excuses and blame flying around. Nobody wins, and you end up looking defensive and uncooperative.
Tense exchanges with a manager are like planting weeds in your garden of career growth. No one wants to back an employee they find disagreeable. Plus, overselling can tarnish your credibility. You don’t want to be the guy who’s branded as out of touch with his actual performance. That’s a stain that’s hard to wash out.
And then there’s the arrogance factor. Picture your manager thinking, “Alex must have quite the ego. He’s really full of himself. Let’s see how he handles the toughest projects I can throw at him.” Now you’re not just under a microscope; you’ve got a target on your back. It’s a recipe for a hostile work environment and, frankly, career suicide.
Alex took all this in and nodded along. He didn’t want to make enemies, that much was clear. But then he asked the million-dollar question, “If I downplay my performance, does that mean I won’t get the rewards I deserve?”
I reassured him that he could still receive appropriate rewards.
While I advised against overselling in the self-review, I proposed a different tactic: consistently showcasing his achievements throughout the year to all the key players. This way, the positive image is already built and firmly rooted well before the self-review rolls around.
When Alex’s boss sees his modest self-review, they might think, “You’re too humble,” and then take it upon themselves to trumpet Alex’s achievements. This approach transforms the relationship from adversarial to supportive. Suddenly, the boss is Alex’s biggest cheerleader, all because the groundwork was laid well in advance.
Alex liked this idea and asked how he could champion his good work throughout the year. I suggested frequent, short emails to stakeholders, where he could highlight his achievements in clear, factual terms. Instead of saying, “I’m the best salesperson ever,” Alex could say, “In Q1, 434 sales calls were made, resulting in $1.2 million in sales.”
I cautioned Alex about how he mentions team achievements in performance reviews. For example, phrases like "I led a team of 50 to generate $3.2 billion" might sound factual but can come off as boastful and overly self-focused. These statements often fail to acknowledge the crucial contributions of teams, the company's infrastructure, customer and partner relationships, and the reputable corporate identity, all of which are essential in driving success.
Alex can promote his work without tipping over into obnoxious self-promotion. This way, his contributions are noticed and appreciated, setting the stage for a much smoother performance review.
In summary:
Err on the side of humility in self-reviews to avoid contentious discussions.
Promote achievements consistently throughout the year with all stakeholders.
Use factual statements to highlight accomplishments without seeming boastful.
By following this approach, Alex can build a solid reputation and ensure his performance is recognized and rewarded appropriately.
Simple, right? Well, not always
I'm here to help. Email me if you have any management or employee challenges. I've got your back, and your identity will remain anonymous.
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